Teresa Neilsen Hayden and her readers have supplied what I believe to be the world's largest collection of spam composed in the style of the Famous Poets and classic poetic forms. Here’s a villanelle for your reading pleasure, composed by Dave Luckett:
To god I swear, it's all quite real:
My son's in stir. I've large amounts
What he has stolen. You can steal
As well as us, so here's the deal:
Just specify your bank accounts.
To god I swear, it's all quite real –
The late Abacha had a feel
For dosh. The oil in flowing founts
What he has stolen! You can steal,
As he did. Slippery as eel,
Was he; now renders his accounts
To god. I swear, it's all quite real –
It's thirty million, under seal,
But if I move, I must renounce
What he has stolen! You can steal
It. Hear, oh hear, my sad appeal:
Just email me your bank accounts.
To god I swear, it's all quite real:
What he has stolen, you can steal.
And then there's this entry by Josh Jasper:
this is the song
of miriam abacha
the spammermiriam is a widower
of some vizeer or wazoo
in darkest africa
and she claims
that her son
had absconded with
thirty large
after her old man
got sent to sing singthat was a long time ago
and one must not be
surprised if miriam
has forgotten some of her
more regal mannersarchy
